fear
is a very bad thing
it makes you stand still when you should runi have offered up my trust and this does not come easily
everyone has doubts, but you can't let them paralyze you.
i have not had the best experience in love or relationships
~ there have been so few ~
and, in fact, they have almost all been complete disasters
i simply learned not to judge anyone by another.
i could never hold you responsible for anyone else�s treatment of me.
i fear being hurt or let down or bashed into oblivion
but i am still here,
biting my lip
holding my breath
and feeling
i'm not going anywhere.
the only thing that would crush me beyond repair is being lied to.
i simply can't take that.
not much one can do could be unforgivable if they don't try to bullshit me.
i'm sitting here happy and warm and feeling cherished and loving it
and if i close my eyes, i can feel arms around me
the memory is getting fainter but it's still there
and yes, i know it's addictive
do you not think the converse is true of you?
the word of today is 'soon'
make it so, please . . .
i miss you