i had a point today

other than i'm so happy i can barely function coherently

i think my love is just the best guy in the world
i mean, i picked him right back, didn't i?
and most of my friends are guys so i have a good base for comparison
(not that i could compare him to any of them)

well, i asked one of my guy friends who is the most honest and laid back
(read ~ 'not as overprotective')
what he thought of my darling just to hear his opinion.

i almost fell outta my chair!

he said he was
"nice . . . cool . . . kinda reminded me of {my best friend}."

now, i know he has looked at me funny
and wondered why i laugh for no apparent reason
at some of the simple statements he's made in conversation this week
and that is why.

see . . . i love my best friend more than almost anyone
and we are very close.
we couldn't keep a secret from each other if we had to
and nothing is too personal for us to discuss.

once, a long while back
we were both propping each other up after really nasty breakups
and we discussed 'us' and more than friends.

it was icky.

just the idea alone seemed totally wrong.

as with everyone you love so much you choke on it,
there are things about him i love dearly
and things that make me want to cosh him over the head.

i spent a lot of time pondering the similarities between the two men i love most.
i'd hate to wake up one day and realize i was trying to replace my best friend
that would have been so desperately horrid and unfair.
then i realized that yes, they have a few similarities,
but i never noticed them until someone pointed them out!

he is quite a few of the things i love most about my bestie
but none of the things that drive me nuts
and still so genuinely unique and individual that he doesn't remind me of anyone but himself.

twentytwo written 2001-07-15